And (trying) to Become a Great Writer

When I was little. I used to believe that I would be this hardcore diary writer, unleashing my wildest dreams and sharing my most private thoughts. This one little notebook would hold the most private and precious moments of mine. I believed this every day until I’d sit down with my pen and quirky notebook. I’d sit down and not write anything. Clearly, I was not the next Princess Diaries.

via GIPHY

I just couldn’t. I couldn’t write about how I embarrassingly called my teacher mom, or how I wish I wasn’t taller than all the boys in my class. I wasn’t able to write about my teachers who made me feel inferior or the ones who made me feel special. I couldn’t even write about the fact that I wanted to be as cool as Tony Hawk one day, and I definitely didn’t want to write about how I was afraid of the dark (and still am).

It’s not that I couldn’t write. Writing is easy, it was writing about myself that was the hard part.

I’ve never been one to share, not about myself anyways (also not my food). I especially hate it when people see me sad, and oddly, I’m also not a fan of people seeing me when I’m really happy. These were moments I’d prefer to share with myself only, in the privacy of my car (blasting super emotional music as though I’m at a rock concert). I wouldn’t even dare put it in a diary. Even if it had one of those cute little locks on it.

Last year, however, I was placed in a position I always swore I’d never be in. Nevertheless, it happened, and it forced me to really look at myself and the way I approached life.

During that time, I really didn’t like myself.

But I was forced to share, and it came out in the ugliest way – my crying face (in public). It was horrific. Not only for me, I’m guessing the people who saw me are also scarred for life. Poor souls. I still have nightmares.

via GIPHY

Still, it made me realise something: That to really kick-ass at life, you must be fearless and honest. Taking the safe route is nearly always the right answer, but to grow skill, nurture talent, and to care deeply, you cannot hide. You have to show the world who you really are.

I love writing. I always have, and for the most part I think I can be pretty good at it. However, to be a great writer you need to be bold, and you need to be brave. Whether it’s a diary entry, novel or magazine article you’re writing, you are essentially sharing a piece of yourself with the world. Your writing your story, and it can’t be great if it’s not honest.

Portrait of a girl with purple hair.

This is my online confession. It’s a diary entry without a lock, and I plan on keeping up with it, so that I can become not only a great writer one day, but hopefully also a great person.